Divorce Helper

If you’re going through the divorce process, then there will come a point where you and your ex-spouse need to decide who gets what. All those CDs you bought together? The TV? The bed? Who gets all these things?

Liquidate Your Possessions?

Sometimes the divorce courts will require the divorcing parties to liquidate their assets so that they can be split. Sometimes one party will buy the other’s share of whatever asset is in dispute.

Whilst liquidating and splitting the asset like this might be feasible with large and expensive assets like land, houses, 401ks and the like, it’s hardly going to work with your TV (unless you have a pretty special TV, of course…).

Bring In The Divorce Attorney?

Your divorce attorney is there to help you, but his or her job is not to divide the blankets and towels. Whilst some divorce attorneys will be more than happy to bill you for their time in sorting out this minor issues, they are a very, very expensive option.

Leave the lawyers and attorneys to sort out the law and make sure you file forms correctly and on time. Leave them out of disputes over minor items that – more than likely – will descend into bickering.

Ideally…

Ideally the final divorce agreement will say something to the effect of

The parties will each retain ownership of all personal effects currently in their possession

and that will be that. Of course the essential ingredient required for this to work is that the possessions have already been divided, and are with their owners. The parties must have come to some kind of agreement – or an impasse – where they are not too embittered about losing their favorite teddy bear.

If You Can, Be Reasonable

There has to be some give and take in these situations. Is the kitchen table worth arguing over for an hour? Do you really want to add more stress to a stressful situation by arguing over these little things? Reach a compromise and move on. You might not get the vacuum cleaner you want, but you got the work bench, so that’s ok, Move on to the next part of your life, and buy another vacuum cleaner!

Oh, and don’t get your attorney involved…

If you want to calculate the potential alimony payments you will have to pay or will receive, then here’s a piece of bad news: it really isn’t as simple as that. The courts will take a long, long time deliberating over this subject, and they do this with the help of experts and professionals. To hope to be able to calculate the figure on the back of a notepad is, well, a little ambitious.

Interestingly this contrasts vividly with child support where the payments there are decided pretty much through a set of well-known and well-understood formulae.

Having said that, there are some rules of thumb that you can take into consideration, and some pointers that you might pay heed to in order to have a rough guess at the magnitude of potential payments.

Some Rough Pointers

The divorce courts look at some specific areas in order to determine alimony. While the particular areas – and the weight, if any, that they hold – will change from state to state, there are some that crop up in most state’s laws.

Length Of Marriage

The first question, and possibly the one most likely to sway the figure one way or the other, is the length of the marriage. Generally, the longer the marriage the more alimony will be due. Why is this? Well the courts’ view is that if one party in the marriage has sacrificed their earnings – and their earning capacity – for a longer length of time, then they are in worse off financially than they would be if they hadn’t married. This is particularly applicable in situations where, for example, the husband goes off to work while the wife stays at home and looks after the children. In today’s modern world these roles could be reversed, of course, but the principle remains constant.

And this neatly brings us onto the next point which the courts may choose to asses: employment status of the spouse seeking alimony in the divorce.

Employment Status

One spouse being – in the courts’ parlance – underemployed for a number of years will effect the alimony payments due to them. Again, the rationale behind this is that the underemployed partner has sacrificed some or all of his or her earnings in order to better look after the family.

If the potential a partner to obtain suitable employment – at a pay rate that will adequately suit his or her needs – then the courts may rule that that person does not require alimony in order to carry on living in the manner in which they are accustomed. For this judgment, age, education, work history, and the age of any dependents will all be considered.

If one party or the other has a debilitating disability or illness then this will be considered, too. Not only will it affect the capacity for work, but it could well introduce costs of its own that need to be settled by the disabled spouse. In these cases the courts would be more likely to require alimony payments be paid to the disabled spouse.

Assets And Divorce Alimony

If one party is set to receive generous assets – perhaps the house in which the family lived or a trust fund – then the courts will take this into consideration when assessing the divorce alimony request.

Other Issues To Consider

Alimony payments may be taxable to the recipient and tax deductible for the payor. This might work for or against either side, depending on the situation, and both sides may agree a better way to spread the costs. Naturally your divorce attorney will be able to help and advise on this side of things.

No Easy Way

From the start we noted that there was no clear and easy way to calculate how much divorce alimony would be paid – or would be due – to either party. Hopefully you will now see that this is the case. At the same time you should now see that there are a few easy ways to assess you and your spouse’s life situation in relation to alimony payments.

Health insurance is not, perhaps, one of the most exciting topics of thought at the best of times. If you are suffering under the stress and confusion associated with a divorce then you are more thank likely going to want to just sweep it under the carpet and forget all about it.

Big mistake.

If you or your spouse are lucky enough to work in a job where your employer provides health insurance, then divorce can really make this side of things difficult. If, for example, the husband in a couple works at a high-paying job and gets the family’s health insurance paid by the employer, what happens if the couple divorce? Does the husband trot off into the distance with the health insurance, leaving the wife uncovered? Does the wife take it? Should they split it? How does that work? Of course if, as consequence of the divorce, the husband is no longer a part of the family, then the health insurance will not likely cover the other members of this unit.

Separation Agreement

If indivisible benefits like health insurance prove to be too much of a barrier to splitting up, then the husband and wife can enter into a separation agreement which postpones the final decision to divorce. This might not work for every couple, but it might also provide an invaluable middle-ground that allows all parties to get accustomed to the split. In addition, the family is still a family so still enjoys the benefits of health insurance.

A separation agreement might be a great idea whether you are struggling with the costs of splitting health insurance or not.

Separation Agreement And Taxes?

Separating in a formal sense might work well for health insurance benefits, but it might have knock-on effects on, for example, taxes. It is important that everyone’s friend the divorce attorney is drafted in to advise on the matter.

If the relationship is in a state that allows an amicable settlement like this in order to preserve the general good, then there is a excellent chance that some agreements can be reached.

CORBA Health Insurance Coverage

CORBA is a federal law which allows someone who is covered under a health insurance policy to continue that policy. The continuation of that policy will be at the cost of the person (or people) who benefit from it, but means that the families who lose the health insurance benefits afforded to an absent spouse are not simply dumped.

In certain circumstances the CORBA law means that the employer who previously covered the entire family will be obliged to cover the divorce husband and wife separately, at least for a limited period. The most likely situation would require that the extra cover provided by the employer eventually be covered the party that benefits.

CORBA may be a way to split the health insurance neatly, with the cost of the coverage for a limited time becoming part of the settlement.

As always it is difficult to figure out you exact entitlements, requirements or obligations without turning to a professional. Once again the divorce attorney will be the one to tell you everything that you need to know.

People in the midst of a divorce are bitter. This is completely understandable and is perhaps the most natural way to approach such a terrible situation. When in this state of mind, and when trying to secure the best future for themselves (and perhaps their children, too), people may be tempted to hide their assets.

Rationale

The rationale behind hiding assets from their spouses is that, if they don’t know about it, then they – and the divorce courts – cannot have a piece of it. They may see these assets as being rightfully theirs, or they may just be greedy about keeping it all for themselves. The rationale might be a fear of not having enough once the divorce is finished to be able to support themselves or their children.

Whatever the rationale behind hiding assets from their spouses – and from the divorce process and its administrators – the idea is a very bad one. Not only is hiding assets illegal, but it simply doesn’t lend itself to an equitable split. We are not trying to judge people or to arbitrate on situations that we don’t know anything about, but these are purely the facts on a logical level.

Tell Your Divorce Attorney

Being absolutely honest with your divorce attorney is without a doubt the best policy. On the other side of the coin, if you suspect your ex-spouse is lying – or asset hiding – then tell your divorce attorney immediately. Something can be done, whether it is now, or whether the behaviour is used as a bargaining chip later in the divorce process. Remember: you know your spouse better than anyone, so it is largely up to you to ‘blow the whistle’ on such behaviour.

Know What Assets You Have

In order to be aware of the potential problem of asset hiding, you need to be fully informed about the assets; if you don’t have the full picture then you simply can’t expect to be able to expect when something untoward occurs.

Compilation of documents before divorce starts may be one option open to you. Think bank statements, checks, receipts pension or 401k statements, bills, and anything else you can think of. Records of any real estate you own should be easy to find (but it’s unlikely that your spouse can attempt to hide the value of your house from the courts: it’s simply too obvious).

If you do not have access to your financial documentation then you might want to try to contact the IRS. At the very least you can obtain any tax returns that you have signed in the past. Remember to have these things mailed to a different address so that you spouse is not aware that you are collecting this information.

Check the transfers out of your bank accounts, and see if your spouse is not transferring money to a private account that you are not aware of. Likewise check that they are not transferring money to someone else with the idea that they will hold on to it for the duration of the divorce.

Valuables

Catalog all the valuables in your house. Make a list of all vehicles, antiques, jewelery, art, or anything else of value. If you have any appraisals of the value of these things then that’s great! Make copies of these, too. Unfortunately it is not that uncommon for people to try to hide items of value once a divorce starts. If there is no record then there is no way for you to prove what was originally there.

Once you’ve collected all this information, give it to your divorce attorney. It might seem like all this sneaking around is tantamount to spying, but remember that the only reason you were driven to this is that your spouse was attempting to hide things from you!

Your divorce attorney can subpoena records if he or she knows something is amiss. Give your advocate this chance by providing the absolute best basis you can.

Divorce is a complex, emotionally draining beast. At best it is complex; at worst it is completely impenetrable. Getting lost in the maze of legal documents, details required, disagreements between the parties, document submission requirements, and the myriad of other responsibilities is really a very common thing to happen. Hiring a good divorce attorney is a natural step which can ease a lot of the pressure. But there are few things you should bear in mind when trying to negotiate the divorce settlement. This article will set out some of the simple things you can do to get the best divorce settlement you can.

Flexibility And Negotiation

The first thing is to stay as flexible as possible. Negotiate and be reasonable. You have to weigh up how much you want – in material terms – out of the divorce. If having a less stressful divorce is more important to you than, say, future maintenance payments, then you might be able to get through this messy situation with a minimum of stress. At the same time you need to stay absolutely firm about your rights. Only let the other party gain ground if it suits you.

Mediation

Mediation is a semi-formal process where the parties – with the help of their respective divorce attorneys, negotiate alimony, child support and a division of assets and any liabilities that might be jointly held. Child custody will also need to be discussed.

Trial

Taking the divorce to a trial is a bad idea, and in this situation everyone loses. It is much better to negotiate and perhaps lose a little than go to a trial and lose a lot. Trials are very expensive, and the outcomes can be a little unpredictable. A trial will also guarantee that the divorce runs for longer than would perhaps otherwise be the case.

If there are children involved in the divorce then you need to be doubly careful about the length of time the divorce takes. Children can take the splitting of their parents very badly indeed, so try not to extend the agony.

Be Logical

You may feel better towards your future ex-spouse, but remember that blind hate is not the best attitude with which to approach divorce negotiations. If your ex-spouse or their lawyer says or demands something that you don’t agree to, then calmly decide on your answer. Shouting “I’ll see you in court!!” won’t solve anything. Do stand your ground, by all means, but try to be logical in the way you approach these things.

While you might think that the divorce is a miserable time for you, remember that your ex-spouse is feeling the same way. They will want to negotiate and get it over with. Use this to your advantage, but remember that he or she is a person, too.